


Waxing Gibbous

by materialism



Series: Franklin [2]
Category: Paramore
Genre: First Relationship, Fluff, Heavy Petting with Feelings, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-05
Updated: 2015-05-05
Packaged: 2018-03-29 03:26:43
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,311
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3880465
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/materialism/pseuds/materialism
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Absence makes the heart confused.  </p><p>(In which Taylor sorts out what he might have been feeling all along.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Waxing Gibbous

**Author's Note:**

> don't you remember what a nightmare t9 was?
> 
> this takes place about a week after "it's all good." again, summer of 2006, taylor and zac are both sixteen. this is basically heavy petting with feelings. 
> 
> disclaimer: i do not own anything or anyone involved in this story. all situations depicted in this work are fictional, as well as all persons. if you are one of the parties involved, i implore you to make friends with the back button. i highly recommend not googling yourself. i'm sorry, god.

It’s another week before they even kiss again. Taylor’s family goes down to Gulf Shores like they do every year. Yeah, Taylor’s excited, but he’s also... He doesn’t even know how to describe it. Empty, maybe? They left the day after he and Zac fooled around and ever since there’s been this weird hole in him. Every moment when they’re not swimming or in town or doing something together, Taylor’s thinking about Zac back home. He’s not going to forget about him, it’s a week, that’s just plain stupid. But he can’t help but think maybe he’ll change his mind about how he feels. 

_hey_ , he texts Zac on the night before they’re driving back. Everyone else is sleeping and he’s wide awake, so he’s sitting on the porch of their little condo. The heat lets up a little bit at night, so he feels way more at ease than during the day. He spends his sleepless nights thinking a lot about Zac. They’ve been talking here and there, but both of them have been too busy to really chat. He’s never cared much about the phone or talking to his friends other than to make plans for hanging out, but now it’s different. What if Zac’s already sleeping?

 _hiiiii :) thought you forgot about me_ , he gets back a minute or so later. His chest heats up. 

_no weve just been really busy_ , he sends back. _im sorry_

 _its okay i was joking. i get to see you tmrw right?_ Taylor’s stomach jolts. He’s never been so excited to see Zac in his whole life. Or so nervous.

 _i mean if u want to_ Taylor types out. He erases it a few times, then types it again and adds a _:P_ to it so it doesn’t sound so insecure. God, he feels like such a loser. 

_of course i want to_ , Zac sends back pretty much instantly. _why would you think i wouldnt want to_

 _im just joking_ Taylor writes back. _hows things back in tn_

 _josh n hayls got caught b ythe cops in the playground foolin around, mom n dad flipped, other than that boring_ Zac writes. 

Taylor has to stifle the huge laugh that comes out of him. _thats amazing pls never let them forget it_

 _like i would :P_ Zac sends. 

They shoot a few more texts back and forth. Taylor tells him mundane things about the vacation while Zac shares mundane things about home. It still feels like they’re just friends. Like what happened last week didn’t happen. Taylor would be fine with that, because the friendship is the most important thing, but still... 

_i miss you._

Taylor checks his inbox three times to make sure the contact is Zac. He’s about to respond when he gets a flurry of texts in rapid succession.

_that was really weird to say i’ms orry_

_too forward i knwo ughh_

_ididnt’ meant o be creepy imsoryy_

A knot in Taylor’s chest, one he didn’t know he had, loosens and all but disappears. He thought he was the only one who felt that way, but felt too sappy to say anything. Zac is the one who wears his heart on his sleeve, telling people he loves them and giving them bear hugs on the most insignificant of goodbyes. Taylor’s taciturn and shy; it took months into their friendship to even do a side hug once in a while. It hurts to think that Zac is probably freaking out right now because of him being so closed off. He bites the bullet and hits the call button on his number pad. 

Zac picks up after the first ring. “Hello?” His normally cheerful voice is steeped with unease; Taylor wants to be where he is right now.

“I miss you too,” Taylor says, small, but Zac hears him from the way his breath hitches.

“Okay. Well. That’s good,” Zac says and they both laugh at that. “I’m, like, way too excited for you to come back.”

“In two days you’ll go right back to being sick of me, promise,” Taylor says. 

“I mean, probably, yeah,” Zac says. “I’ll still hang out with you thought, because you’re a loser and I feel sorry for you.”

“Don’t forget about my house having better AC,” Taylor says.

“Oh yeah. Huge compensation for the hit my reputation takes,” Zac says. He sounds way less anxious. “My mom says you can stay over tomorrow night.”

Taylor’s stomach flips. “I just have to ask my mom but I’m sure she’d be fine with it.”

“I mean, if you want to,” Zac says. There never used to be this air of apprehension to it. Then again, Taylor didn’t think about Zac every free moment of the day back then.

“No, I really, really want to,” Taylor says, and it comes off pretty desperate, so much so that Zac laughs on the other end. 

“You’re so cute,” Zac says. “Wow, that sounded really gay.”

“Well,” Taylor says. Zac laughs at that, and it sounds like what Christmas feels like. 

They talk for a while longer about all kinds of things - new bands they’re listening to, what’s going on at their parish (all sorts of rumors, even though they really shouldn’t be spreading that kind of thing in church of all places), dumb sports shit (though that’s mostly Taylor rambling and Zac humoring him). It feels like their regular conversations as friends, except every once in a while one of them will say something gooey or some kind of sexual comment. Taylor isn’t sure what they are now, though he knows deep down he wants something more. He figures things will unfold as they should.

“Oh wow, it’s 1am,” Zac says with a big yawn. “You should probably go to bed.”

“Me? I think you’re the one who needs to go to bed, mister,” Taylor says. 

“Whatever,” Zac says, and Taylor can practically hear his eyes rolling. “Uh. Thank you for calling me.”

“Of course,” Taylor says. “I’m really excited to see you tomorrow.” He is.

“Same,” Zac says. “Good night. Sweet dreams.”

“Sleep well, babe,” Taylor says, then bites his tongue. “Too much?”

“No, I like it,” Zac says. “Night, babe.”

“Night,” Taylor says, and closes his phone. He looks up to the moon, waxing gibbous, and smiles. He’s finally tired enough to go to bed.

-

They don’t get to be alone right away that night. Josh wants to show him some stuff, so they bounce ideas off each other while Zac practices double bass hits with one foot. (He’s getting pretty good at them, but he’s not gonna tell Zac that until he’s perfect.) Then they have dinner, which they both inhale, but they have to linger to keep up appearances - how was your trip Taylor, tell your family we say hello. By the end, Taylor’s skin is itching with the need to take Zac away from this. When they finally, finally get to go upstairs, no one suspects a thing - it’s pretty late to be hanging out downstairs, anyway. Zac walks up calmly, looking behind him at Taylor and waving. When they get into his room, Taylor locks the door on instinct. They’re alone for the first time all day. 

“Hey,” Taylor hears himself say, in a voice that seems too small to be his own.

“Hey,” Zac says, like he’s some kind of gift, as he places his hands on Taylor’s arms.

Zac doesn’t kiss him yet, just tugs him in. It’s like he can’t get close enough to Taylor, pressing himself all along his body and spreading his palms on his back once his arms have wrapped as tightly as they can. He buries his face into Taylor’s shoulder; Taylor feels a sharp intake of air as Zac breathes him in. How could Taylor have not realized how Zac felt all along? Or even more perplexing still, how he felt about Zac? 

“I’m being so ridiculous,” Zac says, laughing into his shoulder. “I’ve gone longer without seeing you and I’ve been fine.”

 _We weren’t... whatever we are whenever that happened_. Taylor just reciprocates, circling his arms around Zac’s waist. He feels the softness of Zac’s body through his T-shirt and smiles. “You just want a warm body.”

When Zac speaks, his lips move against Taylor’s neck, which makes him shudder. “You’re lukewarm at best. And you stink a little.”

“You like it,” Taylor says.

“It’ll do,” Zac says. “Check the door?”

Taylor does. For the third time, it is still locked. “Still locked.”

Zac pulls away from him and stares right into his eyes. They breathe together for a moment. It feels so natural to lean in at the same time, Taylor able to let go for once. It’s nice that they’re the same height, so he doesn’t have to crane his neck down. It’s nice to be a little rough, because he gets Zac’s comfort levels, what he can take. Zac’s face is smooth, smoother than his, but still he feels the slightest bit of scruff. He thinks he likes kissing guys more. Or maybe he likes kissing Zac more. 

“This is way better than I imagined it,” Zac says when they come up for air.

Somehow, it hadn’t occurred to him that Zac might have thought about that in the three ( _three_ ) years he was crushing on him. “Glad I exceeded your expectations. Which I hope were low.”

“Gah, you’re so cute, it’s so stupid,” Zac says and kisses him again, drifting to his earlobe. Pesky rules about leaving marks. “Do you wanna fool around?”

"Do you wanna just cuddle?" Taylor asks. He winces at how needy that sounds. “I kind of just want to be with you right now.”

"I was gonna say that's gay, but," Zac says, and they both smile. "Yeah, I'd like that."

They take off their clothes not facing each other, an instinct from being friends for ages. Taylor pauses before taking off his shirt, leaving him in just his boxers. The room suddenly feels freezing where it was just cool before. He wonders if Zac did the same. Only one way to find out. 

He turns around at the same second that Zac does and they share a hushed laugh. Always in sync. He does indeed have his shirt off, and he's not as pudgy as he used to be. Neither of them are. He shot up before Taylor did, but he looks so nervous and small right now.

"It's only me," Taylor says, making jazz hands or whatever Hayley calls them.

"You even wore your nice boxers," Zac says, gesturing at his faded plaid underwear. They both laugh, so quiet.

It's too hot for sheets even, so when they both climb onto the bed, there's nothing shielding them but air. They lie facing each other, finding novel ways to fit into each other's space. It’s probably a little too hot for them to be this on top of each other, but Taylor’s addicted to the feel of Zac’s skin, even so soon into their... Taylor wants him to be his boyfriend, but he’s not sure how on board Zac is with that. 

"I didn't think this would ever happen, to be honest," Zac says in the midst of their sleepy silence. "I thought I would just have to push it down and forget about it."

"And now you know I'm a disappointment. I smell bad. Onto hot babes." Taylor reaches out and touches Zac's face, pinching his cheek.

Zac's eyes fall shut and Taylor feels him lean into his touch. "You're so much better than I could have dreamed. I'm so lucky."

It's so out of a movie. But that's what Zac is - overblown and kind of out there, big even when the moment is small. He's slotted himself into the cracks in Taylor's armor. And now that they're in this place, Taylor wants and needs him to settle in for a longer haul. Taylor pulls their faces together so he can kiss Zac's cheek, just a touch. Zac opens his eyes.

"I've been thinking a lot and -" Taylor pauses. "I don't know what you want from this but. Okay, you know what, fuck it - do you wanna go out with me?"

"Go out where?”

"No, dumbass, I mean dating, like you're my boyfriend and I'm your boyfriend and we don't date other people," Taylor says. "Wow that was a mouthful."

"Yes," Zac says immediately.

"That's the most definite statement I think you've ever made." 

"Hush," Zac says and kisses him.

There's been this unspoken distance between them, one that Zac seems determined to break as he presses them flush against each other. So much skin is overwhelming. Zac has always been a furnace, so his touch is almost white hot in his mind's eye. His kisses are feather light in comparison, like Taylor's going to break if he's not careful. He doesn't need to be, has never needed to be, but Taylor kind of likes feeling cherished. Taylor presses back, hoping his touch can convey what he's been trying so hard to say out loud. 

When Taylor shifts his body, he's met with a stiffness pressing against him, prodding at his own half hard cock. Thank God, he thought he was the only one. He hooks an ankle around Zac's to get more leverage, pushing into him and opening up their kisses into something more. He presses his hips into Zac’s, their dicks sliding together, and Zac freezes. He scrambles away from Taylor in a panic.

"You said you wanted to cuddle - I'm just gonna -" Zac says, making to shuffle out of the bed. Taylor stills him by the wrist.

“Did you not just feel me? I’m there too.” It's so hard to get the words out, colored with bare want. "Let me touch you."

"Are you sure?" Zac asks.

"I want to," Taylor says. He lets his hand drift down to rub Zac through his boxers.

"Oh," Zac says, "Taylor, fuck -"

"I haven't even gotten into your boxers yet, relax," Taylor says.

"Wait, you really wanna do that?"

"You're my boyfriend," Taylor says. "Of course I do."

Even in the dark, Taylor can see the shape of Zac's smile. He keeps moving his hand across Zac's cock through his boxers, not willing to slip his hand into them just yet. He's rewarded with a filthy moan from Zac, just this side of audible, which he stifles by biting into Taylor's neck, well above the collar. Taylor groans and squeezes as retaliation. 

"Don't stop, please," Zac says, licking the patch of skin he just sank his teeth into. "Sorry. I broke the rules about the whole above the collar thing."

"It feels really good," Taylor says. "You should keep doing it. Maybe the mystery will be kind of fun."

"What do I get in return?" Zac asks, tone playful, already kissing Taylor's neck again.

Taylor doesn't say anything, choosing instead to dip his hand under Zac's waistband and wrap it around Zac's cock. It's not unlike touching himself, but different enough that it's strange and exciting. Zac's breathing becomes more urgent the more sure his hand gets. He practically attacks Taylor's neck, sucking and biting, the scrape of teeth and swipe of tongue, and still barely muffles his sounds. Taylor's gonna have an issue soon enough if they keep at this pace. 

"Hold on -" Zac tugs down his underwear so they're halfway down his thighs, freeing Taylor's hand from the cloth confinement. Taylor spits in his hand before starting up again, speeding up his strokes now that he has the room to. He feels himself getting harder in his boxer briefs, cock straining against the fabric. To distract himself, he nudges his face into Zac's, a sign for him to lift his head so they can kiss.

"Pull down your underwear," Zac says. “Wanna return the favor.”

When Taylor has trouble, Zac takes the initiative, pulling them down and taking Taylor's cock in his hand. It's already wet, but Zac mimics Taylor's move from before, hand spit slick and quick. He nips at Taylor’s earlobe before pouncing on his lips again, leaving Taylor breathless 

“I’m not gonna last, warning you,” Taylor says into Zac’s mouth, because holy shit, this feels amazing. 

This is easily top five best nights of his life. He’s not sure if it’s because it’s the first time anyone’s done this to him or if it’s because Zac is touching him, kissing him sloppy and dirty. Does this count as losing his virginity? He doesn’t know, but he doesn’t really care either. His hand on Zac’s cock is moving faster as he gets more confident, trying out a few tricks he uses on himself to make him come. It’s not so bad jerking off another guy - it’s kind of hot, actually, in the way that it’s wrong but feels so right.

“Tissues - nightstand - I’m gonna come -” Zac gasps. 

Without breaking his rhythm, Taylor grabs some tissues with his free hand and cups them over Zac’s dick just in time to catch his come. Zac makes a choking, guttural noise that drives Taylor wild, but in his orgasm induced haze, he’s lost his grip on Taylor’s cock. Taylor takes over, hand lightning fast. 

“Kiss my neck?” Taylor asks. He’s just on the edge - needs something -

“Of course,” Zac says, and presses his face into that damp and sweaty skin. 

His kisses start off feather light, but he seems to think better of it, lapping at the already sore skin. He sucks away the hurt, the pressure relieving the sting, but it’s his second bite that throws Taylor over the edge. He comes all over his hand, the shocks rolling over him in waves, erratic like his emotions. His boyfriend just made him come like crazy. He made his boyfriend come like crazy. As he wipes off his hand with tissues, throwing both their soiled paper into the trash bin, he can’t stop smiling.

“Well, that was a good inaugural sex session,” Zac says.

“You’re so cute, it’s so stupid,” Taylor says, and kisses Zac before he can flip him off. They drift off to sleep, the sound of Zac’s creaky ceiling fan lulling them into an ease dreamscape.

In the morning, Taylor wakes up before Zac, early enough so the sun is just rising. They fell asleep somewhat apart, underwear still halfway down their thighs, but it seems as though they found their way to entanglement at some point in the night. Zac is not a pretty sleeper - drooling, hair sticking up everywhere, a bit of a snore. Taylor has known all these things about him for a while, but now he can say his boyfriend is an ugly sleeper. It feels silly for him to insert the B word into every thought he has of Zac, but he doesn’t want to stop at all yet. He runs his hand down the edge of Zac’s jaw. Just a little scruff. 

“I can hear you thinking,” Zac says, eyes still closed. He fumbles for Taylor’s wrist and gently closes his hand around it. “Stop that. It’s loud.”

“I was thinking nice things about you, but those thoughts are now gone,” Taylor says. “Never to return. Bye bye.”

“Good, I wouldn’t want you pretending, now,” Zac says. He finally opens those big brown eyes that Taylor has always liked since they were kids.

“Hey,” Taylor says, half smiling.

“Hey,” Zac says. 

They can’t tell anyone yet. They should probably figure out what ‘boyfriend’ entails, first off. What they mean to each other, what that means in relation to their lives. Who to break it to first. How to navigate their community, their church - God, really, the most important of all. But right now they have this, their sweaty legs twisted around each other, their bare chests and arms reflecting burgeoning sunlight from window panes. That’s enough.


End file.
